Calories

Makan malam.
Aku: What did you have for lunch?

Dia: McChicken

Aku: Do you know that McChicken has more calories than Big Mac?

Dia: I need the extra calories.
(kemudian, dia pandang aku. Tenung aku)

Dia sambung, "Er, but you don't."

(Pada mulanya aku ingin merajuk, hanya order Salad tanpa ayam, dengan warm water, akan tetapi, warm water tiada di dalam menu, jadi aku tukar kepada Sparkling Apple. Aku makan Salad tanpa ayam aku, akan tetapi aku curi ayam dan french fries dia. After dinner, kami jalan-jalan dan aku terlihat Ice Cream Wrap yang enak. Dan aku makan. Boleh ke merajuk sebegitu?)

Secret

Knock. Knock.

"Who's there?"

Ayu.

"Ayu, who?"

Ayu-worth-fighting-for?

That Was Then

Aku duduk seorang diri.
Teringat kisah dahulukala.
Tersenyum.
Terkilan.

Kami pergi kelas Agama.
Ustaz mengajar kami tentang buah-buahan di syurga.

Ustaz itu kata, "Se-enak enak buah di dunia, no matter how far you go, and how expensive you pay, it will never compare to the taste of the fruits in Heaven."
Balik dari kelas Agama,
Aku terima teks dari dia,
(And, yes, I still keep them)

"Just like fruits from heaven, se-enak enak segala buah-buahan di dunia ini, tiada tandingan dengan sebiji buah di syurga,
And so is my love for my annoying girlfriend; future wife. Beyond comparison."

And, like I said,
Tersenyum.
Terkilan.

(That was, then)

Pandai Pula Berkata-Kata

Aku pandang driver kereta, Bumblebee.
Expressionless.
Driving.
Focused.

Tiba-tiba, sebuah kereta memotong kereta kami.

Out of nowhere.
Rude.

He started to curse, "Motherfucker."
Dia kata, dengan nada bersahaja.

Expressionless.
Aku ketawa, sambung, "Ka-na-sai!!"

Dia, pandang aku, geleng kepala.

Dia jawab, "Astafirrullahalazim."

(Isn't he the cutest?)

Character Hidup: Bee

Hari ini, I baca, BumbleBee (bukan nama sebenar) telah mula blogging, akhirnya.

Katanya, ikut jejak langkah Tun Mahathir (walaupun isi kandungan blog Smeagol, bukan nama sebenar, adalah lebih ke arah terrorism), tapi I tahu,
I tahu,
I adalah sumber inspirasi dia mula menulis blog. (hahaha *wtf)
Iya,
kerana I tahu semua bom bom bahasa Inggeris di dalam blog dia juga, adalah di tujukan khas untuk I.
Jangan NAK DENY.
Aku terima bom bom bahasa Inggeris kau.
(haha **wtf)

Character hidup aku, BumbleBee

You either Make it or Break it

Aku dan dia, kami memang berbeza.




Principles, Ideologies, Habits, Hobbies.



How we talk, communicate.
What we do, how we think.

Aku kata, "We're totally opposite of each other. Do you think that our differences will break us up?"

Bermuka poker, dia jawab, "We're totally opposite of each other. But we have one thing in common. We love each other. And that; will never break us up."

(All the lovers can say "Awww.." and all the haters can say "Ewwwwww" now :)

You Can't Top This

Two of my most favorite boys; in the whole world.

Puasa

Bulan depan; kita akan mula berpuasa.

********************************************************

Aku kata, "Bee, you practice puasa ya, this year?"

"No, tak nak.
Everyday, I want to EAT, DRINK and SMOKE in front of you."
Dia kata, sambil beri aku evil laugh.

-_-

Sacrifice for Love

Today, my laptop crashed on me.

Kemudian NN kata, "Your computer just made the ultimate sacrifice."

Aku tanya, "What do you mean by that?"

NN sambung, "Coz dia korbankan diri dia (crash), so that you can go and buy the new iMAC."

I like love her theory.
My laptop making the ultimate sacrifice.
Obviously we have to honor her death.
(I decided the laptop to be female; because she was always such a bitch to me.)

"Dear Laptop,
After all the years we've been together,
it's awfully sweet of you to sacrifice yourself so I can buy the new iMac.
If this is your dying wish; I will try my level best to fulfill it.
To honor you.
Rest in peace."

Dear iMac,
With you around,
This will be a hell of a funeral.

Bonus

"Does this mean that I'm allowed to buy more shoes now?"